We all know that fashion decade trends make a comeback, I didn't bat an eyelid when 70s(?) gypsy clothes came in, or 80s (leggings are now a staple) but 90s. Woah. Hold on. Shut the front door. I'm 29 and it is TOO SOON. When an era is "in" it comes back as a sanitised version leaving the terrible parts where they belong, in the past. I stepped into Miss Selfridge the other day and it looked like frigging Bay Trading. No one wants a return of that.
Trust me I loved the 90s. I am all over the RnB comeback, love spaghetti strap tops and if a channel could play repeats of Streetmate, Live & Kicking and Gladiators I'd be happy as Larry. But quite frankly this trend has gone too far. Here are just a few things that I've noticed have comeback....
1. Scrunchies
I noticed this on my recent travels that girls would wear mega high ponytails with scrunchies. I know they think they are dead fashionable and cool, and I've faced the cold hard facts that they probably are. But my inner voice was just screaming, "Pffftt I was all over that s*** in 1997 when I WAS Sporty Spice." Which leads nicely onto...
2. Sports clothes
Back in the 90s it was cool to wear sports get up when you had absolutely zero intention of any exercise. Thankfully that trend has since passed. That is until I counted THREE MEN wearing Ellesse t-shirts in one weekend. Ellesse?!! Yes Ellesse that peaked in the mid-90s. I remember someone bought my brother red Ellesse trainers as his very first pair of shoes. The now equivalent of Nikes or Converse, for a 1 year old. You might as well just light a match to forty quid because they'll get approximately three wears of them before they're covered in food/crayons and grown out of. Anyway, where were we. Sports stuff for non sports activities. No. No. NO. Hopefully Ali-G will also come back to remind us Reebok ain't cool. Also come bonfire night it was an enormous fire hazard with that much flammable fabric. Let's just hope and pray that poppers don't come back. And no I don't mean drugs, I mean trackie bottoms with press studs down the outside of each leg. Need I say more.
3. Denim, denim, more denim.
I went to a pub in Shoreditch last weekend. You can only imagine. It was like Bewitched meets NSync on acid. Denim was everywhere. Oversized jackets, dungarees, dresses, shirts you name it. Even white denim is back. Denim is a classic look, don't get me wrong, I'm not burning all my jeans. But probs worth checking with your mates you don't look like you're off to a rodeo. And that they're not wearing denim too so you don't actually resemble a 90s boyband.
Photo taken from style.mtv.com
4. Jelly shoes
Yup. Really. Back. Someone was high as a kite when they invented these bad boys but I used to love these with frilly socks. I'm pretty sure anyone over the age of 13 is too old for these which is why I keep seeing them in bargain bins in clothes shops. Not that I've been tempted or anything. Ahem.
5. Crop tops
Way back when I was 8, me and all my mates went to Redcar high street and bought crop tops with the coca cola logo on. We thought we were the actual bollocks. Matching crop tops?!! We OWNED that high street. And worryingly consumerism had got the better of us already, though I'm pretty sure at 50p each they weren't official Coca-Cola merchandise. And now crop tops are back in a big way. So. Much. Belly. AGH. But it's like chocolate covered pretzels, I just can't decide how I feel about them. I decided I'm just about slim and (look) young enough to carry one off (though my inner self is going PAHAHA, who are you kidding). Too late, I bought one. But obviously I'm not going the whole belly-button-out hog and can just about stomach (teehee, see what I did there) about 2 inches of upper midriff showing so wear it with high waisted stuff. That's how Taylor Swift rolls and she dictates cool right now. Plus I'm doing it whilst still in my twenties* (*ok just). And obviously I'm hoping this trend dies out as quick as wearing silk pjs in public did. In fact I'm not sure this ever came in, just Rihanna did it once and Grazia said it was a thing. (It wasn't).
Since this 90s comeback isn't going anywhere I guess I'm forced to embrace it... I'm off down to the charity shops to find some Boyzone cassette tapes, Spice girls wedge shoes and a choker. It's vintage innit.
I found a Polaroid from 1996 whilst hunting for embarrassing photos of my brother (the one blocking my outfit) but you can just make out I'm wearing a crop top with a denim dress and silver glittery jelly shoes and my friend Vicki is wearing Adidas joggers. An explosion of cool.
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